Wanted, Chosen, Loved

Before I write this, I wanted to mention, my writing is coming from a person who believes in Jesus.  That person is me.  Ha. There was some very questionable grammar just now- and I am not going back to fix it.


We live in a world where- like it or not- people are valued based on whether other people like them (want them, choose them, love them).  You see it everywhere- and it makes some sense.  I mean who wants to choose to hang out with a jerk- or even a super annoying person.  It makes some sense. (Worldly sense).

This attitude is deceptively destructive and too easily expressed toward- unborn babies, orphans, the disabled, the lower class, the upper class (probably just the opposite of the class you find yourself in...)
And not because they are all jerks, or annoying (although I'm sure sometimes that is the case( to be clear- I still don't think those reasons make it ok not to love someone.  I just wanted you to know- I understand the struggle of loving jerks and annoying people)), but because, for whatever reason, it is inconvenient to value them.  To want them, to choose them, to love them.

And when we choose not to want them, not to choose them, not to love them. We devalue them.  We see them as less than what they are.  Less than eternal. We see them as temporary.  A temporary problem.

As a Christian, my biggest challenge is to love.

My biggest challenge has been-- to want, to choose, to love-- the eternal.

And to let go of the temporary, when it gets in the way of that.

We are bombarded with a worldly view of what love is.  In every show, movie, commercial, song, news cast- we are told what it means to love.  You fall in love, you fall out of love, just love yourself, love is elusive, love is temporary..

But we know what love looks like. It looks like a Savior coming into a world that has turned away from Him.  It looks like Jesus dying on a cross- after being viciously beaten, and ridiculed.  It looks like a Father turning away, and letting that happen, so we can have eternal life with Him.  (Even the really annoying people)

Does it look easy?  Does it look temporary?  Does it look convenient?

No, it looks unimaginably hard.

It looks like a choice.

Our value is found- at the cross.  Where we are- so wanted, so chosen, so loved


People are not temporary.  They are eternal.  They are valuable.

Our value is not determined by anything or anyone, physically present on Earth.

Our value was determined a long time ago- on a cross.

We don't get to determine anyone else's value- that has already been done.

We get to love- because He first loved us- we can love.  

That ridiculously annoying person- we can love them, that child with HIV- we can love them, that homeless man, that bitter acquaintance... we can choose to love them.

It is hard to love.  But it is a privilege to love.  It is a privilege, as Christians, to be a part of God's will.

I recently was added to a closed Facebook group- full of people adopting kids listed on Reece's Rainbow.

I am humbled by the love I see displayed.  Tough love.  Love that chooses the child who is 8 yrs old and has lived their entire life in a crib.  Love that brings home the 3 yr old with such a severe infection- from medical neglect- that the infection will take their life.  Love that knows it will be hard, knows it will be uncomfortable, knows it would be so much easier to see people as a temporary problem...but they look- and see Jesus.

They see themselves, unwanted, unchosen, unlovable- and they see a Savior- who came, and chose, and loved.

We are the hands and feet.

Someday every wrong will be made right. And I cling to that promise.

But here on Earth, right now, we are given the honor- given the privilege- of being the body of Christ.

We all remember those trendy- WWJD bracelets... And no one likes to say it anymore because...well it's just not cool.
But seriously... WHAT WOULD JESUS DO?

I know I could be inconvenienced a lot more often- be made a lot more uncomfortable- let go of a lot more temporary..

And, I could love people a whole lot more than I do.

i800a

It's Tuesday night, which means I am sitting outside of Bea's dance class. Timmy got home in time for me to leave the other kids at home- which means I have a solid half hour of free time. Wahoo!

We are still waiting for i800a approval(USCIS).  We were finger printed Friday, which was quicker than we expected (yay!).  BUT last Tuesday we got a dreaded pink paper in the mail from USCIS- Request for Evidence.

Which means, there was something more they needed from us to complete our application.

It turns out there were two things left out of our home study.  Two silly little statements- but they are required to be in our home study.

SO that Tuesday began a really long week for me.

 I am very aware that any delay with USCIS- can become a long  delay- so upon getting the- pardon me- stupid pink paper- I flew into action. Contacting USCIS- our home study agency- and our placement agency.  So that we could (and I say we- but really there is nothing I can do to get this done...which is super annoying, frustrating, sad...pick your depressive adjective... for me)- get this sent in asap. And avoid, hopefully, a delay.

Well, it has been a week and there is pretty much no chance this won't delay us by a couple weeks.  Which unfortunately can have a bigger consequence, because the ministry in Marla's country, closes from mid July to end of September... And with no delays...We could have been so close to making it.

We have to travel beginning of April- if we have any chance (still a long shot) of getting her in July.  If not... October will be the soonest we can bring her home.

I know everything will work out in perfect timing.  It doesn't stop me from wanting to hurry the process along.

I am feeling tired this week.  Drained, actually.  Constantly checking my phone- waiting for our social worker to tell me our updated home study has been submitted.

It seemed like they were going to mail it last Friday- but now it is Tuesday- and despite several emails yesterday- a phone call this afternoon- and finally a (not as nice) email sent this evening- when it was clear- no one would be getting in touch with me today... there's been no word of when/or if they have mailed in the additional evidence to USCIS.

Don't worry, the email wasn't mean. Just no exclamation marks... and an admission that I am worried... which for me, is a pretty cool email.

So if you want, pray for a speedy process in getting this approval.  And my sanity, while I struggle with waiting on other people! 

I laugh, but I am really struggling, and would appreciate some prayers.

Bea's class is over, and she is headed my way.  I will try to write again soon!